White Gloves

I was always super meticulous in preparing my green beans for their second careers as sport horses. I had my share of setbacks with both Indy and Runkle, but on the whole they were both extremely well trained before they debuted at a sandbox (or start box).

We were schooling lateral work in dressage, and jumping much higher than intro at home, but that's where we started.

I did all the homework and when we did compete, we won.

I was always surprised when there was a blue ribbon waiting for me at the end of the day, probably because I have impostor syndrome and I assume everyone else is better than me. When I get a blue ribbon, there's a fraction of a second where I think "oh my god, really? What happened to everyone else?" Then I think about how much work I put in, and how hard both horses tried for me that day, and I feel fortunate that my hard work and luck coincided for that day.

I do feel that both horses careers were heart-breakingly short. While I wish I had had more time with both of them, I do wonder if I could've made better use of the time we did have.

How many times did I hang onto that entry because our canter transitions were 'not quite there'?

How many shows did I skip wearing my amazing purple show coat because it was 'only a schooling show' and I would have 'plenty of opportunities' to wear it?

How many cross country jumps did I wave off because I figured it'd be better if I waited for another day?

How often did I put off today what I thought I'd have ample time for tomorrow?

When I think about what I want to do with Spicy, all I see is the next few weeks. I'm planning a small dressage show in May, because I want to go to one before my honeylope and I don't know what the future holds. Do I think he's blue ribbon ready? Not really. Do I think he'll stay in the ring and execute the moves in some semblance of a test? I do.

I was looking at Austen's recent post and admiring her fancy auction pony and both of their outfits and wistfully wondering about when I'd be good enough with my hands to wear white gloves. I love how they look, they're so classic. And then a friend pointed out that judges can still see your hands with black gloves, and if I wore white ones the world wouldn't end.

Today is all we have. Buy the white gloves.